I stayed home from work on Monday. Sam had been sick all weekend and still hadn’t kicked it by Sunday afternoon. I debated with myself for a good ten minutes before I brought it up to Josh.
“I probably should stay home with Sam tomorrow, right?” He agreed.
I sent a couple texts to my mom talking about his symptoms. “I should keep him home from daycare tomorrow, right?” She agreed.
It’s not that I didn’t trust my instincts. I knew the best thing for him would be another day of snuggles and drinking Pedialyte at home. But I also had work responsibilities I had to think about.
My child comes first, absolutely. But my job is important, too.
When we had Sam, we weren’t in the position for me to stay at home. Plus, at first, I wasn’t sure I wanted to stay home. As a Special Education Teacher, my work is challenging, but fun and I enjoy it. After Sam was born, I realized I did want to stay home. But it just isn’t an option right now, so I try to balance being a mom and being a professional. Enter working mom guilt.
I’m blessed, I know, as a teacher, to be able to stay home with him in the summers and for breaks. It still kills me each Sunday evening to think about leaving him the next day for work.
The working mom guilt is real. Lesson plans and IEPs take time away from my baby. My baby takes time away from perfect lesson plans and IEPs. I don’t know if anyone’s found the perfect balance. Everyone seems to feel the working parent guilt.
On Sunday afternoon I spent time writing sub plans and letting my team know I would have to stay home. I apologized profusely. But when I woke up the next morning to snuggle with my sick baby, I didn’t feel sorry. I was right where I needed to be.
Are you a working momma or a stay-at-home momma? Do you feel guilt either way?